Say Yes to the Quest

What doctors can learn from Paula, a Kleinfeld wedding dress consultant

My primary care provider, Dr. Bertie Bregman, sees a patient during the height of Covid in NYC, 2020; Paula, a Kleinfeld consultant, helps my daughter pick out a dress in early 2024 ©Deborah Copaken

Every summer, for as long as she can remember, my daughter Sasha has enjoyed curling up with my mother to watch Say Yes to the Dress, a reality show now in its twenty-second season. “When it’s your time to get married,” Mom always told her, “we’ll go to Kleinfeld’s together, and I’ll buy you your dress.”

Fast forward to last Friday, when that reality show promise suddenly became an actual reality. Sasha flew in from Chicago, where she was visiting her fiancé’s parents for Christmas. My mother took the bus up from Maryland. My niece Samara flew in from California. And then, after watching several old episodes of the show, the four of us made the pilgrimage to New York City’s wedding dress mecca, Kleinfeld. (Which Mom and I always thought was called Kleinfeld’s, with an apostrophe s at the end, but never mind.)

Paula, our consultant, came into the waiting room to greet us. “Welcome to Kleinfeld!” she said with a huge smile. Mom and daughter both seemed thrilled by this stroke of luck: Paula? From the show? What? Amazing! Amazing Paula then ushered us into a mirrored alcove in the store and told Mom, my niece, and me to wait while she helped my daughter into her first dress.

Sasha, as instructed, had emailed the store a few details about both her life and her wedding dress preferences: busy third year med school student; not fond of ruffles, bling, or big skirts; a preference for long sleeves, but willing to be flexible, given that hardly any wedding dresses have sleeves. Paula had pulled a few options from 1500 dresses available and placed them in a dressing room. The first three were all beautiful but not “the one.” Then Sasha walked out in the fourth, and we all burst into tears.